stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Randomize
