i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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