Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize