if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
