There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
