What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
