The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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