Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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