It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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