is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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