he shaved USA in his pubs
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
