I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
