Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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