I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize