if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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