I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
