I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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