Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
and i looked up. we had an audience...
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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