we're blogging at a bar
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
