Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
