is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
