it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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