Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize