I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
