i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
