Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
