Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize