Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Randomize