she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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