One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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