I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
