What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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