last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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