Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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