is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
