So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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