so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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