yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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