she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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