playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
