So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
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