He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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