We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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