The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
