Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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