At least make sure they are 18
Why
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
