Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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