Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
