How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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