bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
